'Dead Girl' review

Also known as ‘unlikeable, unreasonable toolbags do stupid terrible things for shock value’, this movie sucks big time.

Two best buddies at high school go exploring at the local closed-down mental asylum, and discover a naked girl chained to a table, wrapped in plastic. So what do two teenage boys who look like they’re in their twenties do? They fuck her, of course. Then when they try to kill her (as horny teenagers who’ve just committed rape apparently do), they find out she’s a zombie. So what do they do then? They fuck her again. Then they get their friends to fuck her. Then they decide to make another zombie fuck doll by kidnapping a fellow high school girl. Things don’t work out well.

Yeah. It’s that sort of movie. The ‘look how shocking we are’ brand of horror. And it sucks horribly. It’s never entertaining, the characters are never interesting, and the protagonist is such a toolbag that there’s no sympathy to be had for him, and the final dumbass ‘shock’ twist just comes across as pathetically weak. Nobody in the movie acts the way a person acts. There’s some laughable teenage angst thrown in, but that just doesn’t excuse the sheer, insulting, unreasonable stupidity of the central premise.

Actually insulting is the best word I can use to describe this movie. It's so self important and shallow that it basically insults the viewer with it's lazy, faux indie style. Being confronting or controversial is no substitute for being engaging or entertaining, two words that don't apply to Dead Girl. I have no problem with movies that push boundaries or go too far, provided they're at least good movies beyond their premise. Dead Girl is its premise, and even that is weak.